Sometimes I think the harder you fight the more resistance there is such that more energy is expended to accomplish the same amount. It’s like jogging 3 miles, but every time you increase your pace the wind blows back in equal proportion, so that you still only jog 3 miles, and you do it in the exact same amount of time, but you’re more worn out and exhausted at the end.
Even if you increase in strength and stamina from the extra exertion, so that each time you jog you can run faster and faster, the resistance is just going to increase proportionally. Like Sisyphus pushing that damn bolder up the hill every day. You gotta know by the 1000th year of that he was exponentially stronger than when he started. Didn’t matter. Push rock up; rock rolls down (lather, rinse, repeat, buy more shampoo).
Of course the analogy breaks down because we don’t move a fixed distance, and what looks like getting nowhere builds character and hope (if we have eyes to see), but that is hard. Especially when most people in your life only have a snapshot of you. You come into their picture only regarding specific expectations and needs. For them, those expectations must be met in full, to their standards, on their timelines, and are all high priority, front burner, world-ending-if-not-done-right-and-on-time issues, and your value to them is based on how well you meet those expectations, no matter how unrealistic, and they do not see the depth and density of your life, care what else you’re doing or about healthy balance.
Our lives are motion pictures but we see one another in still frames.Let us now praise Crony Capitalism and its offspring: rapacious consumption, driven workaholism, false identity, burn out and debased culture.
“I believe in love, Alfie. Without true love we just exist.”